Taking Turns

Chad and I have been applying for jobs, cleaning up resumes, praying hard and fasting for job opportunities once he finishes school here in April. It very surreal for Chad. He is nervous excited and very nervous. (yes, double nervous).
  Today he got a call in response to a resume he sent to a company in Phoenix. He was elated! He text me the company name so I could research them a little and then I was elated! One of the many reasons we decided to work before Chad went on to pursue his masters is because he is so passionate about so many aspects of engineering, he wanted to get a feel for what he would want to do in the "real world". This company offers it all! The work a lot with the city (which he's very excited about) but they also do big projects that involve hydraulics and geo-technical work. Plus, did I mention its in PHOENIX?
   He called the receptionist as soon as he got out of class and arranged a skype interview for next Thursday. As soon as he hung up, I could see it in his eyes. Anxiety. I wouldn't go as far as to say it was fear but definitely some doubt and stress sunk deep into those big blue eyes. I asked him how he was feeling about it and he said, "Its just so surreal, this is the rest of our life!"
   Its at times like these that I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who designed marriage to be a sacred and beautiful partnership between Him and a man and women. Truly a magnificently balanced team. Chad has helped lift me up and edified my perspective on countless occasions, sometimes, I get a turn to outline a different and eye-opening perspective for him.
   As we've spent months fasting and praying about this impending decision, I felt such a comfort in our lack of plans. If you know me, you know I am prone to stress and anxiety so its out of my character to be calm and collected about not having a plan after April but I know that at this special time in our lives, the Lords given me the peace in my heart that comes from trusting in His plan.


  -I don't know if we'll be living in Rexburg past April 12th
  -I don't know if we'll get a job, and if we do, i don't know where it will be or when it will start
 - I don't know how much we'll be making or what kind of house we will be able to afford
 - I don't know if I'll still be working at Cambridge Court in 2 months
 - I don't know the next time I'll see my sisters
  There are so many things I don't know

But

 - I know that right now, chad and I are exactly where we're supposed to be.
  -I know we are keeping our covenants and seeking the Lord each and every day.
  -I know that the Lord hears and answers prays in his own time and that his time is perfect.
  -I know that I married the perfect man for me, and that he'll always provide and protect my family.
  -I know that as different and Chad and I are from each other, we are united in our eternal goals and our desire to do the Lords will.
  -I know that where ever we are come April, it will be because we studied out our options, sought after the Lords guidance and followed in faith.
  -I know that I am extremely blessed. I'm happy and healthy and have everything I've ever wanted right now. I have nothing but adventure and new beginnings ahead of me!

When I really break it down, I know a lot more than I don't.

THEN

The interview

   Chad prepared all week. We practiced questions, talked about what we wanted in a company and what kind of sacrifices we would be willing to make. We consulted with my dad and Chads brother Ryan, who both have dealt with hiring and Ryan, exclusively with engineers. As Thursday morning rolled around, Chad rushed around the house in a paniced, nervous haze. But we said a little prayer before the interview and 45 minutes later, chad walked out of the computer room with a grin from ear to ear. It went perfectly! He was so confident with the whole conversation and felt like the job was his.
Chad finally realized what a asset he is! (Something a wife knows from day one) but now that he has this perspectivehe's just unstoppable!
  After his interview he rushed to catch the last few hours of the Career Fair at BYU. He was a new man, so confident and excited about getting interviews. He came home with two more interviews and 5 companies to apply for with recruiters references. We went to Grandmas Library to discuss the new options and talk about what he's interested in. As he discussed a few of our top options, i found myself switching roles with Chad. I was nervous, overwhelmed and regretfully, doubtful. I got in the car and as Chad raced through all the pros and cons of different companies i quietly shut down and started to cry.
  This was the rest of our lives we're talking about! The first company you go to work for can pattern the rest of your career. I just realized that so many of our decisions in the past have been no brainers, or have required little to know serious conversations, we've just  had the same goals and standards so it's been easy to align our will with the Lords. But for some reason, I freaked. I just got pushed out of my comfort zone of faith.
  It's Chads turn. He gets to lift me up.
  Chad and I drove home and went into a quiet room to pray with eachother. When we knelt down I was still a little teary eyed and upset so when Chad asked me to say the prayer, i looked at him like he hadn't listen to anything i had said i the car!

"Chad, really? you want ME to say it?!"
"Kayla, I think you have more concerns to take to the Lord than I do right now."

He was so right!

I'm grateful for that man.

I realized I needed to build my testimony further of faithfulness and trust in the Lord. Chad makes me better. This whole experience has been so empowering for us and while we haven't made and decisions, its going to be a beautiful year. The tables turn quickly around here, one second I'm thinking I'm the power house and the next I'm getting carried through a trial by my sweet husband. I'm grateful to have married up and I know Chad and I are going to grow so much through these next few months.